Yankee Doodle Dandy Cat

Catzowey it's almost the FURst of July which means the 4th of July is just a few catnaps behind and are you curious as a cat to know something fantasticat? Shhh, don't let the cat out of the bag ... itza fine feline time to be a Patrioticat, unfurl the flag and wear it PURRoudly! As far as my smitten kitten self knows, I don't have any Pilgrim geneticatically altered genes in me cuzza I'm EyeTailYun. Oh shuksatini the Pilgrims holiday izza with turkey and taters in November, and the only fireworks are when thereza no leftovers!

AttenzeeOhKnee! AttenzeeOhKnee! Me and my paws are on countdown fur the sparklies in the sky, abundacat barbeque meats dropping to da ground and catnapping in the sunny sun rays - all on the 4th of July. Are you sayin' maybe I'm a tabby teeny bit USA'un?

Gusty and fairly cat-O-strophic winds are keeping my flag from unfurling proPURRly. I luvs da excitement of Independence Day cuz I'm an independakitty too so it's a meowvalous day fur me to prance my paws around San Franfuncisco in my "non finicky feline & fine" independent meowster mode!

YEOWza MEOWza I'ma exhausticatted from wrestling with my flag so I just hadza catnap faster than da pop top opens on my food can. Itza kinda Speed-Sleeping!

When I wakes up, I'm gonna beeza bizzi meowmorizing the Declarashun of Independakitties! I thinks it goes something like "Four feline scores ago, our fat cat forefathers landed on the shores of Catalina Island".... Shuksatini again! Itsa hiss fit time cuzza I gotza the wrong speech meowmorized. Hahem....here I goes, Uno Due Tre and a oneza twoza threeza, "We hold these Pawsative truths to be self-evident, that all cats are created equal" - yep uh huh datsa da right Declarashun of Independakitties - woo hoo!

You and yourza have a fantasticat 4th of July and make it a nonCATastrophic one too! Remember to be a respectacatable envirocat: don't leave yur trash at da 4th of July barbeque or youza won't be getting da invatayshun next year!

Ciao & Meow,

GUIDO the Italian Kitty

Astronomicatical Summer Solstice

Catzowey! Me and myself just made it thru the longest day of the year and yep uh huh, it's also the FURst day of Summer time. Sum sum summer time or did someone say supper time? Not to worry if you didn't know it was the longest day of all da 12 meowvalous months - as long as you know there was an itsy bitsy bitza more of the sun and that's all scientificatically correct and furry verifiable. Basicatically the theory is the extra sun light really helps me be a relaxacat while it helps my mellow yellow lemon tree purrduce the fruits.

I purrpondered thru my abundacatanps, if my lemon tree was fruitfully flourishing in the extra minutes of CalEyeFurKneeYah sunshine on the longest day of the year, and it was a unanicatamouse decision that me and myself grab that ecstaticat extra second of sun ray too (hey this Summer Solstice isn't justa fur the lemon tree).

Itza no drama in da Bahamas! This is da real deal youza seeing: the extra long sun ray from the Summer Solstice and I'm maxicatting da benefits of this speshule really long day of the year by just kicking back enjoying it. I luvs da sun to bathe in. And checksa this out .... I can sun bathe and tend to my lemon crop too ... all simulcatulously!

Wishing you a nonCATastrophic week filled with sweet and not sour sun rays!

Ciao & Meow,

GUIDO the Italian Kitty

City Kitty Turns PURRgressive Farmer

My 4 paws and me are getting into the organicat dirt this week. Doing some hot-house farming cuz I wanna have a grounding experience. And I found out, yep it's aFURmative so I'm letting the cat out of the bag - the right organicat soil for yur crop is the secret to growing da vibrant veggies & purrfect plants. Oh basta pasta, I don't own a farm in the agricatural belt of CalEyeFurKneeYah - I'm a City Kitty - so my feline farmer self is growing da greens in the house's hot-house. Catzowey the hot-house has a dual purrpose: I can catnap in da hot- house too cuz it'sa sunny and hot, exacticatically the way a hot-house is supposed to be (and the way a feline likes it!). Check out my grow-it-myself crops ....

This home grown fantasticat pepper izza speesy spicy and tickling my tasty buds!

It'sa so hot in da hot house that I fell asleep on the job. It'sa fantasticat I work fur me and myself - can get tired but never fired!

Holy Chokes Moly! My crop is rolling me over!

Basta Pasta! Me and myself izza gonna return to being just a simple smitten kitten EyeTailYun city kitty cuzza growing hot house veggies is increducatulously exhausticatting. Four paws UP to all da great organicat farmers who rock, yep, they'za rock just like my favorite Radio City Rockcats.

Me and myself wishes you and yurza a nonCATastrophic week!

Ciao & Meow

GUIDO the Italian Kitty

ComPURRhensively Browsing The Books

This is a week fur getting educated and  expanding myself and  I'ma not cat chatting bout my waistline (they don't call me Expando-Cat fur nothing!) Catzowey I'm ecstaticat to tell you and yurza,  me and myself has been takin' da lessons - yep uh huh - genuine lessons so me and myself can speaks more molto meowvalous. Youza know, my EyeTailYun accent is thick asa barrel of buffalo mozzarella, so me and my paws trekked downtown to PURRlitz Language School and enrolled, after paying with my MasterCat Card.

After my week at da  PURRlitz Language School where I consistacatically heard  "Arriverderci Guido" to my EyeTailYun accent,  I was still in da learning mode so I popped my tail into da big Library building. Now lemme tell ya, that's a place for catnapping & serious snoozing .. it's meowvalously quiet, nobody is cat chatting, no TV or infurmercials, and there's lots of places to hide and tuck into comfurtably at da Library. Oh I furgot to tellza you, there's catzillions of books to get uppa on, yep uh huh, youza can get way up high and hide for a day in da Library. And they even  got little lights to brighten up yur space - well if you can figure out da Light On and Off butttons!

This is me in da Library where theyza keeps abundacat mounds of books. Big, really big  giganticat art books in a purrEyeVat collection. Look at me sitting on "The 9 Lives of Meowtisse" and "Picasso-cat Painting" too! But I still can't get my library reading lamp to light up. Wonder how many of my 9 lives I gotta use up befur I get this thing to work correcticatically! Uh oh,  do I  see an off shore hiss fit arriving soon?

Don't catnap thru life and  never furget to keepza learning - NOWZA is always the fantasticat time fur learning something new and meowvalous!

Ciao & Meow,

GUIDO the Italian Kitty

Economics of AFURdable Relaxing

My EyeTailYun eyes see da times are Tom cat ruff and tuff while litter levels are dropping, tuna tartare is doin a disappearing act offa da shelves, there'sa no shurimp Rice A Roni on myza stove top, da fog is keeping da sun rays away, CalEyeFurKneeYah is having hiss fits and General Motors isn't purring - hmmm, my 3 years old motor generally purrrrrrs terrificaticaly.

Catzowey - I've gotta da upbeat and big treat news and mews fur youza .... yep uh huh, itza da Guido 4 Paws UP exclusacat ways to be a relaxacat! All da perks in da comfurt of yur home. Getta ready to relaxacat!

Tiparoni 1:

ReFUR to da foto of me and myself on my jungle cat gym. Yep uh huh, thatsa Tiparoni number 1 and as youza see, the secret izza all abouta captivating da Balance - withouta da good balance youza might feel like a hypochondriaticat ... a little offa da balance. Thatsa reason to have da big hiss fit -and definicatically thatsa NOT relaxing!

Tiparoni 2:

Kick back! But IF youza not wearing da sun screen loshun and potion fur relaxacting, denna youza must catnap under a chair so da "Oh Know Itsa Da Oh Zone!" rays donta attack youza and yurza skin - then yurza delicatable whiskers won't wiggle.

Whenza youza puts UP yur feet, Catzowey youza really is relaxing, and yep uh huh, be shure to relax on yurza back when ya can - takes da stress off yurza full and well fed tummy.

Tiparoni 3:

Fantasticat flexibility is a giganticat part of da relaxing - really molto bene meowvalously- like believe me and myself when I sez da total relaxAYshun makes you a relaxacat. In dis foto I am a total relaxacat!

Tiparoni 4:
Donta beeza basket case and get a kink in da neck so be shure youza catnaps and relaxacats ina good posishun. Not resting correcticatically can cause a hiss fit when youza wakes up from relaxing.


Wishing youza anda yurza a nonCATastrophic week, and hoping there's some relaxacat time inna yurza hecticat schedule!

Ciao & Meow
GUIDO the Italian Kitty

Patrioticat Has A Birthday Celebrayshun

Holy Guacamole, Catzowey Catnip and Celebrashun paws UP cuz

Meowmorial

Day AND my birthday only comes once a every year (no matter if you hazza 9 lives or 1!) and its my absoluticatical favorite weekend in the whole 52 weeks of da year.

Hmmm, letsa me counta how many catnaps there are inna 52 weeks. Me and myself luvsa Meowmorial Day and I wearza ourza flag purroudly cuzza Ima Patriotikit.

Yowza nowza Ima revving up my paws cuzza I am 3 today. Derza rumor: says Ima departing the yungun feline stage cuz the Vet chart sez I'm a teen cat now. Duzza that mean I can get my paws behind da wheel of da Catolac car and drive downtown ? Furget it..I purrfur my limo driver as heeza molto meowster efficient and I canza kick back my paws and be a relaxacat - read da news and mews with my paws up and no road rage hiss fits cuzza Ima in da back seat without a steering wheel.

Are youza curious as a cat wondering what I'ma doing to celebrate my birthday? - Well this mighty meowster izza doing something I've always dreamed abouta - playing da piano!

It's mewsic to my ears and I purr whenza I hereza da mewsic of my EyeTailYun composers and oPURRahs - like Vivaldi, or Don Cat Giovanni and ofacoursa, da Marriage of Feline Figaro (nope not da Meowzart stuff - heeza not EyeTailYun one bit). Didja know da piano was invented by Bartolomeo Christofori ? Heeza cool cat.

Yep uh huh, thatsa me and da Steinway Grand Piano. No way I wazza gonna start my piano lesson on a Yamaha!

This fabucatulous grand baby of dem all is courtesy of my speshule furiend, MCP In The City. She gives goodza hugs and gives meeza her piano too! That wiggles my whiskers!

It's notta so easy tooza play da piano and my teacher, well she didn't have soza mucha payshunce witha meeza so she turned me loose to learn da keys on my own - her lasta words befur she ran out da door were "Guido get uppa close and purrsonal with da 88 keys and youza donta needa me cuzza youza furiendly - Ciao Baby!"

So, I getsa myself really uppa close tooza keys , trying tooza meet anda greet every onza of dem, (Basta Pasta there izza so many keys tooza know!) And Catzowey.... whereza da Sheet Mewsic? Every piano Meowster Master has da Sheet Mewsic...

This izza da PURRfect birthday fur me and myself! If youza is inna da neighborhood drop by fur some catnip cake and impurrted EyeTailYan gelato and LaLaLasannya too. Purrobably gonna pop some Furench Bubbly (I dontta drink cuzza I'ma yungun but I likesa to bat da imPURRted corks!) Ya only turns 3 once in a lifetime (even in all da 9 lives there's only 1 time youza can turn 3).

What a difference 3 years makes! Hereza my 2 months yungun self learning howza to beeza an acrobaticat in da circus - so, da piano playing shudda be a slam dunk for me and myself!

Wishing you a fantasticat, nonCATastrophic and meowvalous week!

Ciao & Meow,

GUIDO the Italian Kitty

The Cat In The Hat - Thatsa Mio Myo

Without a doubtacat youza  knowza all about da old time famous feline  book "The Cat In The Hat". And  famous bookz  like that,well, somethings theyza never goza outta  da style (thata means theyza always IN style). Butta definicatically cat chatting, there's absoluticatically no doubt I'ma still in style, cuzza I'm a cat in the hat!

Yep uh huh, me and myself izza in style anda thatsa purrobably cuzza I'ma da EyeTailYun kitty too! 

Attenzionee youza! These izza da colors of myza homeland, EyeTailYa - and I tell ya there'sa no colors likesa these! Didja ever queshun why da  purrty rainbow isn't vibracat colors like Red White & Green?

Youza purrobably PURRpondering where me and myself  getsa my fantasticat hat, and I'll tell ya. My really speshule catzowey furiend Hazel Lucy  handmade it fur me - yep uh huh, Hazel Lucy deezined it, CrowShayed it and shipped it frumza her house in PencilVaneYah. Her meowvalous talented paws will make youza  blankets, baby gifts anda  hats fur big heads too! (donta aska how many meowameters my head is - it's justa big!)

Anda more meowvalous news and mews I wanna youza to know -  after she catnapped, she CrowShayed da scarf fur me tooza. 

I'ma supposed to beeza saving dis outfit fur Columbus Day feline-festivities but I'ma so ecstatic to have it,  so me and myself is checking itta out and inside too.

Dooza youza likes this "Maurice ChavalierCat"look? I tipsa my hat to youza cuzza it's fantasticat to knowsa youza.    Make it a nonCATastrophic week!

Ciao & Meow,

GUIDO the Italian Kitty